Monday, February 26, 2007

I'd notice

You have no idea how I wish I could turn back time and correct the idiotic things I have done over the years. And because I am me, karma is biting me in the arse and won’t let go. *sigh* It’s freaking tiring but I have to accept the consequences of my actions, no?

When will this end? I mean give me a break. I GOT it. I’ve learned my lesson. I am sorry. Please go and make someone else miserable. Every time when I thought my life finally falls into place, BAM it got messed up again. It’s not funny anymore.

The painful bit is I gotta keep everything to myself because I cannot handle criticism and counsel. Yes I am wuss. A tired wuss that is.

This constant headache is not helping either.

Okay, enough whining, more on happy things, well other stuffs.

I was reading Grey’s Anatomy’s recap, yes, I googled the recap because I am impatient. I also read House, Gilmore Girls, Heroes, Ugly Betty, all three CSIs. Anyway, I read the recap and something Addison Sheperd said that got me thinking.

"It makes you think. You know, what if I went missing? Would anyone notice I was gone?"

I think and I think. I used to ask similar question but in a more morbid way. "Will you cry for me when I die?" My excuse was I had to many glasses of whiskey. No one took my question seriously or maybe I imagined asking the question. Maybe.

I don’t know about other people but I feel invisible at least once a month and PMS has nothing to do with it. Sometimes it feels that like I have taken one step back and then the whole world just swoosh by like in the movies. It scary because no one seems to notice that I am not there, not "swooshing" with the rest of the world. Now I am usually very good in finding excuses to make myself feels better, and all I can come up with is "I think too much". That’s a lousy defense.

Back to the question. I am sure my family members and colleagues would look for me for the obvious reason, but that question isn’t really about them is it. I don’t know why am I thinking too much about it. Maybe I’ve been listening to my friends and their love life and that made me wish I could bore them with my stories instead. Hee.

Alex (Karev) tells her, "I'd notice." Addison: "What?" Alex: "If you went missing. I'd notice."

I wish I have an Alex in my life.
I also think Alex Karev (Justin Chambers) is SUPER HOT.
Super hot because he is a dad to five children. I always find men who loves/knows how to handle kids - sexy!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

yep, he's hot.

I'm sorry you're in that house of cards space. It sucks, but it does get better. Pinky Swear.