Thursday, May 29, 2008


I was surprised when I was told in certain part of the state; a lady must marry before the age of 27. Otherwise they are seen as expired goods. Hee. Okay, I added in the expired goods bit but it sure felt like it.

Me: Nah, expired sudah kita Claire (Claire, we’re considered as expired goods)
Claire: Tidak pa la. Saya buat clearance sale 50% off (No worries. I’ll do a 50% off clearance sale)
Me: Bah saya buy one free one lar. Macam? (I’ll do a buy one free one promotion. What do you think?)
Aunt L: Sot (Nuts)

We (including my married aunt) laughed at ourselves silly.

It was the hot topic for the weekend. Finally the first of my generation got married last Saturday. My grandparents waited 30 years for this and we hope we don’t have to wait another 30 years for the next wedding. Hee.

I harassed my younger siblings and cousins (almost all of them are in a relationship) about their wedding plan when I was told a male cousin of mine is in a dilemma. He plans to marry after he turns 30 (he’s 23 years old) but the girlfriend’s family insisted she marries before the girl turns 27 because it is their custom. I didn’t see the problem until I found out the girl is two years older than my cousin. Which means the wedding must take place in the next two years! Talking about pressure.

Weddings and marriages are a good thing. I however feel that one should not be pressured into getting married. I have friends who got married because they (as a couple) have been together for so long, that is the right thing to do. It is okay if you’re still in love and what not but when one of them stays in the relationship because that person do not have the heart to hurt the other party though there is no more love and went looking for it with someone else, doesn’t that spell d.i.v.o.r.c.e. to you? I have another friend who got married because the mother told them to. Heh?

But what do I know.

Another single aunt of mine (who retired many moons ago) told me that I am lucky to have Ekiel without the hassle of a marriage. I agreed absentmindedly. People assume marriage is not in my agenda because I didn’t tie the knot despite my circumstances. Honestly, I don’t know. I want a wedding but not the headaches of a relationship. Boleh?


Pictures from the wedding.

What do you when you got bored at the reception due to lack of alcohol and good looking men?
Take funny picture of course. *LOL*

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Tuesday's rambling

Hello peeps.
I keep telling myself I’d blog later but that later never came.

When will I change?

I know this is late. I’ve actually written my personal review of the AF6 finalists but I never got the time to transfer it to my blog.
Anyhoo, I am happy that for the first time since I got addicted to Akademi Fantasia (AF) - season three, no thanks to my family, my choice of student won the competition. Though I love Nubhan’s voice, I think Stacy is the most consistent and definitely the better performer compared to the rest. Her Aku Stacy performance was WOW. I like the way she dances and the character she gave to the song.

Correct me if I’m wrong. I couldn’t think of any Malaysian artist who could sing and actually dance on stage. Yes, my knowledge about the local music industry is almost non-existent.

Despite the things I heard about her past, I think she is a good example of dreams do come true when you believe in yourself and you work hard for it.

The bit where the students were given each one wish, she wished for more time with the principal unlike the rest of the students who wishes for food. What were they thinking? That was going to be their last meal? Hee.

I hope she’ll shine brightly as a star.

The past weeks were a series of tests of patience and sanity.

Most times I wonder if it was worth the heartache, the headache and gastric from the unnecessary stress.

If I didn’t need the job I would have thrown my resignation letter aimed directly at that person’s head and started screaming “I QUIT AND YOU SUCK!!!”

That would be the day.

It’s frustrating when people treat you like shit though you’ve been nothing but nice to them.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

my weekend


I swear the weekends/public holidays feel shorter these days. Nevertheless, it felt good for I get to spend some time with my son.

The Cherry Third Quarter Kinky Queen took us out on Sunday. We went to the amusement centre where Ekiel really enjoyed himself. I couldn’t stop laughing when he wanted to play one of the car racing machines. With the big screen, he looks so tiny but it didn’t stop him from turning the steering wheels right and left and change the gear from time to time. At one point, he even went down so he could step on the gas pedal. *LOL*

How do you turn this sideways?

You should also see his expression while playing the “Hit the crocodile” machine.

The next day I took him to the barber. While waiting for our turn, he refused to cut his hair saying my mom already cut his hair before. I told him it is a non negotiation circumstances and he needs to cut his hair so we could take a decent picture of him for school registration.

I lifted him and put him on the barber chair. He didn’t look too happy but surprisingly he didn’t even try to fight back. I think he knew it was pointless. Hee. He was very obedient and did what the barber tells him to do. For someone who couldn’t sit still for a minute that was a big accomplishment.

Now he looks so different. Somewhat like an accountant but there’s something cheeky about his look now.

I did promise him a toy car if he cuts his hair so I took him to the supermarket to pick one. He went around looking and touching every toy he sees. The toy selection wasn’t that great so I told him we would go somewhere else to get it. Then I thought I’d get him one of those box toys, you know the one with junks and a lousy toy in it. He shakes a few boxes and surprised me again by saying he doesn’t want it and all he wants is some drinks. I asked him if he wants chocolates too and he said no.

I think I would hit the Jackpot this week.

He’ll be three this Friday. They grow up real fast don’t they? He’ll be going to pre-school next year. I cannot help but to worry. How is he going to mix with the other kids? How is he going to deal with the “daddy” issue? How am I going to deal with the “daddy” issue?

Honestly, I am freaked out.
But I am confident that both Ekiel and I will be able to handle it.
One baby steps at a time kan?

Saturday, May 17, 2008

sat morning reminder

The past few days I let myself whirl in self-pity.
Is it that time of the month you ask?
Well I guess it is.

To make it more dramatic, of course, I listen to sappy songs every night.
Sure those songs have nothing whatsoever to do with me but that’s beside the point.
Every drama must have a soundtrack right?

Why am I so depressed?
It started at work. Someone treats us like shit but we were told to give someone a break because that person is under pressure and has personal problem to handle. Like HELL-O? Everyone has problems so why give that person special treatment? To add salt to the wound, people point finger at our direction for things that doesn’t involved us. How does one not get affected by this madness?

I almost lost my temper but I cool down almost immediately because I find it silly when those people who tried to comfort me are the ones who makes my life miserable.

The funny thing is, whenever I feel the world is unkind to me, I am ALWAYS reminded I have plenty of things to be grateful for. It’s annoying sometimes but it is the truth. *sighs*

The first email I opened this morning reminded me that my job is not so bad after all. There are many other people who had to do hard physical labour for minimal pay and zero benefits. My job is not so bad; it’s just the people who make it hell. I should count my blessings which I am because I may still be out of job with bills to pay and my son to clothe and feed.

It's easier to complain about the injustices that are happening in our life and we tend to forget other people's misfortune. *whistles*

I am thankful for all the reminders I get because it helps me to be a better person despite what other people think of me. Call me weak, ugly or stupid, that's their opinion because I don't think highly of them either. Ha.

At the end of the day, they don't control my life. For some weird reason, our path crossed but they are not permanent fixture in my life. So, why should I let these people mess with my head right? They don’t pay my bills and they surely don’t give a shit about me.

Shame on me for letting this people spoils my day. You would think I already know all this at my age. *LOL* Trust me I do.

Friday, May 16, 2008

the david idol

*clap clap clap*
I have never met anyone more idiotic and self-centered than these people.
I thought they are fictional characters in the movies made up by people who obviously got problems they do not want to admit.

How anyone blessed with a sound mind can be so evil?

Is this what they call survival?
If it is, then it is shitty.

So, it’s David vs David in the AI7 finals.
I have people asking me who I support or like.
I don’t know really. After Elliot Yamin (season 5) got booted out I seriously lost interest in American Idol. The reason why I on and off watch this year’s AI is because of the raving reviews the contestants been getting. When they claim that this is the best AI contestants ever, then one must not miss it no?

My mom, sister and friends are fans of Archuleta. Why not? He’s adorable and his innocence just seals the whole package. What I love about him besides his voice is his eyes. How can anyone not melt when staring into those eyes while he sings you sweet song of love? Archuleta is a great singer but that is all he can do. Just sing.

Cook on the other hand is an entertainer. He knows how to make a song his own. I’m sure he also knows how to make a woman throw her undies at him. *wolf whistles* He doesn’t have that kind of voice I like but I just love his version of Billie Jean and First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

So who’s my pick?
Call me whatever, I pick Archuleta.
He had me when he shook his booty to With You last week.
That is what you call going out of your comfort zone people!

Maybe it is just me but to me Archuleta is more AI (winner) material compared to Cook.
Cook is more Rock Star: Supernova material.
I know I know I am silly.

No matter who wins, they both deserve it and I am sure they will have a successful career doing what they love the most.

As for the rest of us, we shall have this talk again next year!

what to wear?

I am still *cough cough* but the flu bug died already. *woohoo* Still having that mild chest pain whenever I move around especially when climbing the stairs. The doctor I saw yesterday blamed the other doctor (whom I met last week) for not prescribing the right medication.

One of my cousins is getting married in next week and my sister is very excited. She already asked me what to wear and so on two weeks ago. You see, weddings do not happen very often in my family which explains the excitement. The last relative who got married was what? Four? Five years ago? We didn’t even attend that wedding for some reason.

Okay there were few distant (First cousins? Second cousins?) relatives who got married and invited my mom but that doesn’t count right?

The other day, my mom told me that she and another aunt was also worried about what to wear for the wedding. Hee.

For some reason, people get paranoid when they need to attend functions at the hotel be it formal or informal. I too have that problem sometime but I just sucked everything in and pretend it didn’t matter to me. Obviously it does but there is no way I am going to let everyone knows it kan?

The way I look at it, things could only go two ways.

You could either OVER or UNDER dress.

Over-dressing. Been there done that many times. I wish I could delete those memories from my head. Like that time when my friends and I dressed to kill for our Christmas dinner only to be told that the hotel screwed up our reservation and we had to join the “break fast” buffet dinner because my fasting friends were hungry and we were too lazy to go anywhere else. Imagine us with their tubes and mini skirts among the tudung wearing diners. Yes, it was very uncomfortable. Yet, it didn’t stop us eating like there was no tomorrow.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing bad about being overdressed – if you like the attention that is. Of course once in a while I too would wear that a little too low cut blouse just because I felt like it. *winks*

Under-dressing could either work or not work to your advantage. Like duh kan?


i. People would not pay attention to you so much

ii. People would not mistaken you as one of the bride’s entourage/performer for the night

iii. You could leave the place without much effort.


i. No one realize you’re there – better bring your own camera

ii. Some may mistaken you as the waiter

iii. Some people would think that you have no dressing sense

I’m no expert but my advice is dress how you feel comfortable. Hee. True larr bah kan? I don’t understand why some people just like to torture themselves. Not that they look that great anyway. *rolls eyes*

Sometimes it’s not about the clothes but how one carries themselves. No? This is poor people talk? LOL. I guess so but does it mean that I worth less as a person because I wear unbranded clothes? Don’t bother to answer it ya. I am just talking crazy here.

Here In My Home by Malaysian Artistes For Unity.

Those who know me know I am not the most patriotic person in the planet.

Don’t get me wrong, I love and proud to be a Malaysian. I just don’t wave the Jalur Gemilang every August (like almost Malaysian) just because it’s the Merdeka month. To me, patriotism is something you keep close to your heart every day.

It doesn’t mean the “louder” you are the more love you have for the country kan?.
Don't you know?
Do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.
Or something like that.

Here In My Home by Malaysian Artistes For Unity.

Read about it here at Mr Manager – one of my daily doses of coffee.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Happy Mommy's Day

When I see myself in the mirror, I am in dire need of TLC.

My hair needs bonding.
My feet need pampering.
My eyebrows need saving.
My skin needs loving.

It’s tough being a girl.
But it’s tougher being a mommy.

So to all mommies…

You’re doing a great job!

The other day my sister and I were discussing about doing a belated Mother’s Day thingy for my mom, grandma and aunts. We decided to get each of them a nice charm bracelet or something that says “World’s greatest Mom!” Hee. I know it’s tacky but it is something my family would love.

Later that evening, it hit me.
I wasn’t counted in the gift list!

I want one too!
*sticks tongue out*

Monday, May 05, 2008

I x heart today's Monday

I hate being sick. *cough cough* *sniff sniff*
I wish I could just take the “sickness” out and put it in a jar and left it out in the sun to die cure itself.

After the surprise change of plan, my class finally started again. For a while I was beginning to think the whole thing was too good to be true (especially when our bond was shortened to one year!).

Our first class this morning was Management in Information System and Information Technology. I have no idea what the class was about. I’m sure the lecturer tried his best to make the subject interesting and related in our work, I’m sorry, his best wasn’t good enough. I do try to pay attention but it’s difficult to concentrate when my body demands a bed and the rest of the class was making jokes only they themselves could understand. *whistles*

I couldn’t help to worry about my work in the office too. I hate all this unnecessary headaches.

Work sucks. No, the organization is not so bad, it’s the people who makes it hell.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Last weekend...

This entry is taking FOREVER to finish so I am just going to sum it all up not because I could not find time to do it but because I don’t remember most of the trip already. Yes, I am that old already.

Last weekend, my colleagues and I went to Kinabalu Park and Poring Hot Spring to familiarize ourselves with two of our many products.

We were told to be there before 7.00am because the bus will leave with or without us. I woke up late that Saturday morning and I rushed around the house like a mad woman. I arrived 20 minutes before 7.00am at the meeting spot, to find no one was there yet.

I should have known better that these people will never be on time. Shame on me.

We finally took off around 7.30am. What I liked about the trip is the guided tour. I didn’t realized my knowledge about Sabah was THAT bad. *whistles* I need to surf the internet more.

One of the many waterfall along the way

First stop was at Nabalu. For those who are not from Sabah, Nabalu is somewhat like a market that sells local food and fruits, and souvenirs of Sabah. It’s funny how we Sabahan buy souvenirs like we’re from some foreign land or something.

Mount Kinabalu from Nabalu

he clouds swirled the mountain peak

The view of the Mount Kinabalu from Nabalu was SUPERB. I managed to get a good photo of the mountain and myself.

Most of my photos are self-snapped because for some weird reasons, pictures other people took for me turned out pretty bad.

The Mamut River

Our next stop was Poring Hot Spring. The lunch was pretty good but if I knew the trail to the Canopy Walk was crazy, I wouldn’t stuff myself so much. Not only my stamina embarrassed me, I thought I would past out from the sharp pain I felt on my right abdomen. I managed to drag myself up those stairs /hill and yes, I was the last few to reach the canopy point, but at least I didn’t need a rescue team to come and get me out right?

The Canopy Walk

Those who knows me well knows my phobia of wooden bridges. My legs went into jelly mode and I shamelessly wobble through the bridge. The canopy walk was about 41 feet off the ground and I looked down once and immediately I knew it was a BIG mistake. I said my prayers and braved myself to finish the walk. I survived ungracefully.

While the rest went to take a dip at the natural hot springs, I recuperated with two bottles of mineral water, two glasses of Iced Lemon Tea and a cup of coffee.

We stayed in a gorgeous rajah Lodge (it’s somewhat a presidential suite) that costs more than RM1,500 a night. It has a fireplace, three huge rooms, a nice dining area, a small kitchen and a fantastic view of Mount Kinabalu. I wish I owned the place.

Rajah Lodge

The living area

The fireplace

For dinner we had BBQ and steamboat buffet and it was DELICIOUS.

We planned to have a drinking session but some were not comfortable with my boss so they went to have their own party. I stayed behind because I am a nice employee and had few drinks with 2 staffs of the resort where we talked about politics and the younger generations today. Not my favorite topic but…

The first thing I saw in the morning


Next day, I had another feast during breakfast. All the fresh air makes me hungry. Then I was told I could go for another hike instead of the inspection. So off I went for another hike and a full stomach. The walk wasn’t as bad as the previous one but I still struggle a bit especially when I need to walk up the hill.

The Silau-Silau Trail

While walking, I was surprised to hear something/someone called out my name. It didn’t say CLARA but more like CLA-a. I looked around and guess what I saw, a HUGE frog. Or is it a toad? Anyway, I told the frog I want to take a picture and it didn’t even move. Like the butterfly. It was fluttering around as I tried to take a shot and I told it to stay put for a while and it did. Coincidence? Maybe but how cool is that?


We came back in time for lunch but I was too full and sweaty to eat anything. We left around 1.00pm and we stopped to buy fresh food and fruits.

Gosh, I made the trip sound boring. But trust me when I said I loved d it especially in the morning where I just sit back admiring the majestic Mount Kinabalu with my favorite music blasting in my ears and I just enjoy the serenity and my own company.

Enjoying the morning view

Mount Kinabalu peaking through the trees

Look what was waiting for me when I got into bed at 1.00am!

Me at 6.30am!

I just love the clouds