Friday, November 28, 2008

thanksgiving (belated)

Kristen Kreuk in Partition, Jessica Alba in Sleeping Dictionary.
With half of Asia wanting to be “Hollywood”, we have them acting as Asian.
Isn’t it ironic?

With Christmas peeking from the other side of the corner, this year will be over soon. With all the functions, plans, and what not, the whole December would just *swoosh* us by and I’ll be whining about New Year resolutions all over again.

Btw, this year’s New Year resolution is another flop. So I am bringing it forward to next year. Recycling is always a good thing.

Like I said before, I am thankful for everyone and everything in my life, good and bad included. Despite the constant b****ing about life, I am very aware I am blessed in so many ways.

Despite my crazy family, we sure have a lot of great times together.

Despite my busy and faraway friends, I know they are always there for me.

Despite my heartbreaking work, I am able to pay the bills and afford to indulge once in a while.

Despite my tight pants, bad skin & helpless hair, I am in good health with a sound mind.

Despite my hyperactive naughty son, he makes EVERYTHING okay.

So, this has been a great year despite the minor inconveniences that happened along the way.
I can’t wait for Christmas.

What is my Christmas wish this year?

A laptop.

So Mr Santa Claus, macam? Boleh bah kan?

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

can I get a what what?

I’m sorry. My yesterday’s outburst is not enough.

Sometimes I feel like I over react over the smallest thing.
I really need to learn to relax and just enjoy the madness.

Ekiel: Don’t worry mommy. You just relax ah.

Ekiel’s reply when I asked him to take my HP from the bedroom.

But anyway, it’s not easy I tell you.
My lungs expanded so much with all the inhaling and exhaling in my attempt not to lose my cool from all the poking and the taunting.

And yes, because of that I seem to be a little rounder these days.

I’ve been having weird dreams these days too.

The weirdest one was a couple of nights ago when in my dream an old man came to me and said my luck is not shining. He brought me to a lady who said “Lucky you don’t believe it, that is why it doesn’t affect you so much.”

She said some things and there were flashes of light with strong breeze and I was thrown backwards. I know so very the Hollywood but I swear I am not joking. She also gave me an instruction of what to do.

Wake up at 6.30am. Eat a hard-boiled egg and flush it with tea mixed with honey before 7.08am.

I know. I was like “Heh?” too.
Some dream of gorgeous men or romantic flings, I dream of crazy people.
Now tell me if life is fair.
*hangs head in disappointment*
Oh well.

Despite everything, it is a wonder I do not end up psychotic like some people.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

30 days before Xmas

I smell like chicken curry & fried noodle.
Trust me this is not a good smell on anyone.

Christmas is 30 days away. *woohoo*

Unfortunately, I have lost Christmas spirit few days back.
I kept it in my pocket and I must have dropped it when I ran around like a headless chicken trying to make sense out of everything.

Not only I lost Christmas Spirit, I’ve also misplaced Patience, Hope and Common Sense.
Did any of you see them?

Excuse my need to get this heavy feeling out of my system.
*bang heads on the wall harder than usual*

I feel so much better.

So, every year, I challenge my talent and skill to shop within my limited budget. I have done pretty well in the past years but this year I worry I am not focused or disciplined enough to do so. *sighs*

Since I am so self-absorbed these days (yes, I do realize it kay), I think my Christmas present for everyone is my undivided attention with no eyes rolling or one of my Heh? faces.

Amacam? Boleh ka tu?

I’m not cheap, just practical.


Friday, November 21, 2008


When I saw the video in Eskay’s blog, I immediately recognized the hippo as myself when my friends and I go clubbing before I have the 7th glasses of LIIT. *giggles*

For some weird reasons,

my heart aches every time I watch people falling in love on television. Now people, don’t jump into conclusion thinking I am lonely and desperate for Mr Right Now. That is definitely not the case.

I must admit, it did crossed my mind which I freaked out because I am Clara, I don’t do desperate despite the constant b****ing about the lack of men, good men within 10km radius of my location.

Notice the word lack? I am an optimistic person Wuss! You’re the one who’s bloody negative. *whistles*

If that is not worrying enough, my tear duct seem to be broken too. I cried watching *censored* (censored not for anything dirty, but I am embarrassed because it was a kiddie movie)! It is not funny I tell you. I had to pretend something got into my eye, to cover those mysterious tears, which I know no one believed me.

Emotional is the correct word to describe my present state.

I am a mess. With the shameless tears, my temper could also rise within seconds but I’ll be okay again few minutes later. Many times I want to shake someone by the shoulders while screaming my head off and smack the back of their head. BUT the sensible me reminded me I am no Ally McBeal. I’d have to cut myself into three to be anything like her. I’m sure that hurts even more.

Instead of behaving like a baboon, I laugh at the silliness of the whole thing. Trust me, funny bah. Take one step backward, tilt your head to right and squint your eyes tightly. You’d be surprised to see what is actually happening.

So why the chaos; both in my head and in my heart?

As I get older, the happily ever after seems to fade away. I can see it from where I am standing but I am still nowhere near the Promised Land. Plus, it is always about them (the idiots) isn’t it? Provocation is my friend these days and when I show slight emotion, I am called the disrespectful and sensitive one. Heh?

With all these, my whole common sense bound to get screwed.
Only thing is, I thought it’d be much later in life and it would involve liquor, a bar counter and undergarment lassoing. Not a lot of tissues.

Happy weekend people.