Monday, July 30, 2007

Merdeka! Merdeka!

The whole Merdeka launch was a success.

Number of gun dropped during the TATU (Navy) silent performance – four.
Number of birds that refused to fly out of their cage – two.
Number of birds that flew out and hit the nearest tree – one.

Besides the aching feet and losing the sole of one of my heels, I am very happy this event is OVER.
Until next year of course.
And I am SO not looking forward to it.

My weekend was a blur.
I went back about 7pm on Sat.
Slept early, which doesn’t happen very often.
On Sunday, my son woke me at 7.00am and insisted I wake up.
The whole day, I received sms-es and phone calls from the office.
They need me to help them burn few CDs for today’s function.
Seriously? *grrr*

I don’t mind really, but when I have people finding faults over nothing, I get really annoyed.

Like this morning when Ms Difficult questioned my colleague why were we wearing baju kurung (malay traditional costume) instead of our uniform. She said we have uniforms for a reason. Like ‘duh’?

I don’t get it. Her staffs also wear baju kurung on Fridays, so why didn’t she make a big deal out of it? She must have woken at the wrong side of the bed today. Well, not only today but for the past year! Someone should really tell her to try and wake the other side of the bed so she wouldn’t be such a bitter person.

Sometimes I wonder if she finds fault with me because I don’t retaliate like the rest of them.
There are staffs who tell her off when she messes with them.
I think it is rude not only because she is senior staff, but because she is older than the rest of us.
My mom taught me better than that.

Last night my son and I watched RV.
He practically narrated the whole movie to me.
In his own language.
While I was watching the same movie.
Then he slept with his sunglasses on.

This morning, when he woke up, he asked for the sunglasses and puts it back on.
I’m sure he feels really cool because he was giving us the half smile.
A smile that he unsuccessfully tries not to reveal.
Then he followed my dad to send me to work.
He sat in front with the seat belts on.
Recounting everything he sees along the way.
Like a mini tour guide in his pjs.
And with less information.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

For those staying around KK area and feeling very patriotic, come and join us in our Merdeka Month Launching this Monday, 30th July 2007 at 9.00am. There will be raising of the Malaysian & Sabahan flag, singing the Negaraku (Malaysia’s national anthem), the release of 50 pigeons, TATU performance from the Malaysian Navy, cultural performance by the resort’s cultural group and light refreshments.

It is 3.19pm and I am still in the office (I only work half day on Saturday) because I have the full dress rehearsal for the above function at 4pm. Don’t worry, I am not going to do any performance and what not. I just have to be there for the sake of being there. Don’t understand? Don’t worry. I don’t either. This is like the 7th rehearsal I’ve attended and all I do is stand and follow the organizing committee around like I have nothing better to do with my time.

Something weird/funny happened this morning.
Someone warned me that she would report me to HR because I didn’t reply her email and got someone else to reply it for me.

This is the story.

My dept is in charge to make sure that we have sufficient collateral for marketing purposes. They were supposed to record everything they took but of course sometimes that doesn’t happen. Because of this we sometimes face problems like no stock when we need to distribute them at a fair and what not.

So, yesterday, one of the staff complained we only have 200 flyers left and that is insufficient. So Ms Difficult emailed to me and complain about our lack of responsibility doing our job. Thing is, this job is no longer under my to do list. So I ask my colleague who’s in charge to reply her. Very professional and courteous. We told her there was 500 flyers left last Wednesday. Since Ms Difficult is the only one holding the store key, where did the 300 flyers go? We offered a solution; to do a weekly check on the collateral and keep the key with us to ensure all collateral taken is recorded.

This morning, she emailed to my superior and said I wasn’t being appropriate for not replying and asked someone who is not in the position to write such email. She threatens to report me to HR for this.

Wtf? That’s right. I said the same thing too.

Then someone told me according to Ms Difficult, she didn’t believe the email was from my colleague and insisted that it was me who provoke my colleague to write such email because we hated her for warning us about taking lunch too long. Heh?

I don’t know. This is the same person who accused me of playing politics just because I didn’t invite someone to join us for our sunset cruise. My email was respectful and polite. No accusations. No name calling. No angry words. Suddenly she go around telling everybody I make someone send that nasty email because I hated her for lunch hour thingy? I don’t remember about the lunch hour incident anymore.

What did I do?
I called her and apologize. I explained to her why I asked my colleague to reply her email.
All she could say is "Hmmm" and "Thank you".
Oh well, we can’t please everyone can we?

Friday, July 27, 2007


Chocolate milk.
I’ve never really fancied them but these days I am addicted.
Like two times a week kind of addiction.
That is nothing compared to someone who could finish a large chocolate bar within an hour.
I know.
But I’ve never really fancy chocolate.

People say chocolate is better than certain things but I have to disagree.
I mean, sure they’re tasty but that’s that.
They’re just cocoa, people not happy pills.

To that someone who licks the chocolate wrapper because it is a sin not to, shame on you. *tsk tsk tsk*

The only way I like my chocolate is with lots of cashew nuts!
Almond... not so bad but I still prefer my cashew. And pistachio.

You know what I am craving for at this very moment, corns.

Life is still good.
But it will better if I hit the RM6 million jackpot.
The things I could do with all the money.

When I hit the jackpot (note the optimism), the first thing I would do is weep with joy.
Then the necessary thing to claim the money and make sure it is safely in the bank.
(No, I am not going to swim with the money. Imagine the paper cuts!)
Pay my bills and arrange a nice vacation for my family & close friends.
Yes, close friends who went through my downs with me.
Buy a house. Open college funds.
Then life goes back to normal.

(It just occurred to me that I might have already written something about this so please forgive my temporary amnesia).

Is it strange that I won’t quit my job?
I don’t know.
I have this love hate relationship with my job.
Though most time I am very indifferent about it, there are days when I want to just walk out from the office. Of course there are days when I do not want to go home or looking forward to go to work. Although the latter have very much to do with people/events/functions, but hey it is still a very good feeling.

Today, I dread the work (especially the last minute ones) but I look forward to see and chat to some people from work. I am also very happy to finally settle almost all tasks that made my life miserable for the past weeks.

So today is a good day unless someone ruins it later. It’s only 12.40pm. Plenty of time to give me grief.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

this and that

Something big is happening around here and I am not sure I am allowed to share it, so all I’m going to say is “HEH”?

I guess, no matter how good you are, you are still dispensable in an organization this big. It makes me wonder about my place here. I hope when I go it will be because I want to go and not because I was asked to.

Nothing much had happened since my last entry except for the big thing I mentioned earlier.
It’s sad when the only thing exciting happen to me has something to do with work.

These days, I tend to hide in my own world. When people around me go on and on about everything, my mind would drift, into things, some I am shy to talk about and there are times when my mind drifts into nothingness. I could sit there pretend like I care but I am already out of this world. You could leave a message but don’t expect me to get back anytime soon.

I know some people think I am crazy but why should I worry about what they think?

It’s a great feeling to be able to just “go” but it can be scary when you go momentary amnesia when you come back. Or is that just me? Have you ever woken up one day and forget who and where your are? No? Really? Then you don’t know what you’re missing.

This entry is really pointless.

If my son could read he would say “Not funny” while giving me “OMG, you’re an idiot” look.
A smart boy that one.

His newfound passion, singing.
He could only sing the last word of the phrase.
“(I love) you... (You love) me.... (We are happy) family....”
Yeah, it’s cute.
But trust me, you would think otherwise after the 100th time especially after midnight.
And he is one persistent boy.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

i try

I will never understand many things in life.
I’ve realized and accepted the fact that maybe it is meant to be that way.
My need to understand is insignificant.
The world doesn’t care what I think.

I have a sickness.
Something I loudly despise but quietly give in to.

I am a pushover. A pleaser.
There I said it.
In my defense (yes I have a need to justify it) I don’t do it for the glory.
No. Never get me wrong.
I do it to maintain peace among mankind.
Honestly, I do it because I couldn’t stand confrontation.
I am afraid I will never be able to stand my ground.
To fight for what is right.

Let’s face it.
My tear duct isn’t working very well for I cry over every damn emotion.
I could scream and argue as loud as I want but once my tears starts to flow,
The screaming doesn’t have the same effect right?

I will say what I feel need to be said, but I will do the way I feel it is right.
And now ladies and gentlemen, is not the time.

Those days when I complained about the (previous) office, I had no idea that thing could get any worse.
Apparently it can, in ways that are beyond my imagination.
I must have been so terrible before to be put under these circumstances.
This is Karma biting me in the arse. Again.

So what am I going to do about this?
That’s right.
I am not going to do a single thing.
To take action, you must be very confident of yourself.
You must be indispensable.
Unfortunately I am not it.

Some people may disagree.
“It’s easy to find money” they say.
*rolls eyes*
Until someone offers to pay my bills, or I found another job, I’m keeping mum.

I do TRY to be pleasant.
What goes around, comes around.
Do unto others what you want others do unto you.

They should also include a warning with those phrases, “Damn difficult to do”.

It’s tiring when no one else bother to be nice.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Crazy July

July sucks.
The saddest thing is it’s only the 21st.
The month feels too long.

My camera’s spare battery is now at the bottom of the sea. No joke.
Then my camera magically disappeared. *bangs head on wall*
The other day I lost my nametag while doing a charity project and I had to fork out RM20 to replace it. Bloody hell.

Work still sucks.
Politics still gives me a headache.
I thought my previous working place was bad, but this is just madness.
I refused to get involved, but people are just throwing my name like nobody’s business behind my back.
Of course, no one wants to admit it larr.

It sure feels someone/something is determined to make my life hell.
Oh well.
The world ain’t gonna stop and listen to me whining about my problem.

I can’t wait for my holiday, 14 more days to go. *woohoo*
I will pig out and laze like a dugong on a deserted beach.
I need a break and I deserve it.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Long Overdue pt 1

The island trip.

I was worried over a lot of things. Related and not related. I know I have no control over the weather and everyone else’s mood. Still I worry one of those thing will spoil the whole trip. Fortunately the weather was good but I can’t say the same about the mood though. Oh well, you can’t have everything can you?

I’ve realized long time ago that whenever I am on a trip with friends I will have the most/biggest luggage among all. People used to tease me about it. They think because of my size, I have lesser space in my luggage. You know big size, bigger clothes. I know it makes sense so I’ll just agree with them so they would just shut up. What they don’t know is when I travel, I need to have a spare (or two) of everything that I will need for the trip. I don’t think I need to explain myself. Apparently this obsession is hereditary. That is why when my family and I travel anywhere, we look as if we are moving to a different country.

I have learned not to over do it after the crazy charges I had to pay the last time I flew with some airlines.

Before we left, I’ve warned everyone not to do anything crazy because I basically go to the island once a month for inspection. Did they listen? You think? But everything was done in the name of fun so I didn’t have to resign and move to the moon. I admit I was a LITTLE embarrassed but I am sure/hope those people won’t think I am crazy just because my family is. Ha.

Like I said the weather was good but it was a little windy so the water was really choppy(?). None of my family members could swim so we opt to sit/stand on the sand and TRIED to build sandcastles. Tried because the sand wasn’t really sandcastle-building-friendly. So my siblings buried my son instead because when you’re on the beach you need to build/bury something. Or so they said.

The BBQ buffet lunch was OK. *whistles* It wasn’t as great as I remembered it but that doesn’t stop us from stuffing our face. Not only we ate for twenty instead of eight people, we were also the loudest among all the tourists. Yes we were happening like that.

We all went back happy and toasted.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007